Beck’s best advice is to find the shhh I’m doing math vintage retro shirt but in fact I love this elders: Watch them, listen to them, and hear the way they’re telling the story of the world. “That story is what’s going to change you,” she notes. Though there isn’t a one-size-fits-all rubric for finding happiness—and one can definitely not assume happiness is found from an Instagram feed—there are common threads between the personal choices elders make and how they align with their positive outlooks. Below, Beck shares the key elements to becoming an elder that mirror what I’m seeing (and aspiring to) in my idols. When was the last time you saw Dame Judi Dench leaving Nobu Malibu? Literally never. (Dame Dench lives in an English farmhouse and can be found most days enjoying tea with a few of her closest friends or relaxing in her garden, according to the L.A. Times.) In the famous words of Tina Fey/Liz Lemon, “I want to go there.” The Dame is not alone, and the list of elder celebrities choosing farmhouses (Hi Ina. Sup, Martha!) over nightclubs goes on and on. Paula Sutton runs the popular instagram account @hillhousevintage, which gives her followers an inside look at her countryside home, a place she now lives after giving up a successful career at Vogue. This stillness—removing oneself from the fray of the modern world and living a #cottagecore lifestyle emphasizing a return to basics including fresh ingredients, sunlit rooms, and sprawling spaces meant for pointless strolls—is the escapism I so crave.
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But you don’t have to operate in extremes—where Kendall Jenner’s going versus what Meryl Streep is up to. The French philosopher Blaise Pascal once said, “All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.” Beck agrees. “You either don’t learn that with age, in which case you could become an older, or you learn to sit quietly alone in a room and go through the shhh I’m doing math vintage retro shirt but in fact I love this anxiety that brings us into a space of deep peace. And that becomes an anchor for everything. These women have experienced it all: love, breakups, marriage, divorce, marriage again, divorce again, death, and so much more. What separates them from us is not only do we bear witness to their loss, but we also see their recovery. Jennifer Aniston’s highly publicized Skype interaction with Brad Pitt set the internet ablaze, the same way the couple’s October 2005 divorce was plastered over every tabloid. To get on a video call with your ex after a very messy, public breakup and be completely okay with that—calm and relaxed as ever—is what character growth looks like, my friends.